James is in California for a math conference. Even though I'm in one of my I-feel-awful-and-therefore-wish-to-wallow-in-sorrow-and-solitude moods, I kind of wish he was here, mostly so I could send him on a hunter-gatherer quest for tasty noms such as pizza, English muffins, mint chocolate-chip ice cream, and... juicy hamburgers. Oh, and a large stack of assorted pancakes. Yes.
I would share the tasty loot, so it might be worth his while... right? Ha. To be honest though, I don't want to share the food because then that means that when I throw up my first helping of tasty noms, there might not be any more to try again with. (Whoever thought of "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again" probably didn't imagine failure as large plops of vomit into the toilet which send vile rebound splashes right into your eyes and nose.) I'm pretty sure this MINE mentality is a side effect of starving, no? See the clip below (you can spare three seconds, right?) so you understand what kind of MINE I'm talking about.
Sigh. Maybe I should put on outside clothes and go... I don't know, stare through the window of a pizza shop looking pathetic. Maybe the people on the inside will think, "Aw, poor pregnant woman. It looks like she's too poor to buy scads of pizza. Maybe I should give her five large pizzas with lots of breadsticks. And ice cream."
Anyway, in other news, Pterodactyl sure picks funny sleeping positions. Sometimes I'll look down at my belly and discover it to be... oddly asymmetrical, like something is trying to dig itself out of my right side. I'll gently press on the lump (which feels oddly like a super tiny skull), only to find it retreat in surprise. Then I'm suddenly symmetrical again. This has only happened one or two times, but I think it means Pterodactyl aspires to be a headbutting champion. Or a contortionist? I can't imagine any position which requires mom's belly to jut out on one side to be comfortable. I sure hope she isn't planning an escape like that one alien that claws itself out of people's bellies in the movies. Ew.
Well, ta-ta for now,
Jenna and Pterodactyl
Awww I've heard some strange stories about baby positioning. I had a friend who had tiny foot prints and hand prints pushing out on each side of her tummy. she showed her husband and he would not touch her till after the pregnancy he was so weird-ed out. About the staving, I wish I had know earlier! I could of ordered a pizza and sent it your way! Next time :P
ReplyDeleteI have vomit advice (since I have recently had a few bouts) I sit on the toilet and use our little trash can for the bathroom. That way I don't have splashy rebound, my stomach doesn't have to push so hard against gravity, the smell isn't right in my face, I don't have to rest my arms or head on the toilet bowel, and I get Clifton to take the trash out for me (after I tie the bag). Though, of course, it isn't as easy to get rid of with a flush I believe the aforementioned pros outweigh that little con.
ReplyDeleteMuch love to you and Pterodactyl!